Don't Have The Papers To Have An Opinion

I always dwell on the adoption and adoption-things around referral time. Can't help it. No matter how much you don't want The Wait to rule your life, by definition, it does.

Here's the scene:
About a week ago at the office, a bunch of the women are standing around in the lunchroom having a discussion about their children, and, mostly, and most importantly, other peoples children. i.e., they are giving their opinion on children not under their control, or aura of influence. My dad, who is my boss, and male, is also there for the first part of the discussion. I think it was triggered by something that someone was reading in the paper, which usually means it isn't good...

Everyone's freely exchanging ideas etc...the boss leaves. So now it's "The Moms" only. I've been standing on the sidelines, but doing the nod or head shake, small comments of agreements.

I come up with a point that I want to bring up. As I open my mouth and start to speak, one of the women says "Now, remember you don't have a kid yet, so think about what you are going to say."

What?!?!??! What the hell!?!?

So, the fact that I've been planning to be a mom for, oh 2 years 2 months (well and the 3 years before that I was trying), you know, I've never thought about how I'm going to raise my child, I've never thought about how I see other people raise their children?!

What the hell - I've had 30 some odd years to just have a brain and think in general.

So, now I'm waiting for not only my first child, but the right to have a thought.

So, how long after H comes home, does my official registration of being a mom arrive? Does it come by Fed Ex, UPS, or courier pigeon? Do I have to file paperwork with the government? Department of Health and Family Services? Or is it a state run program?