I didn't get arrested, and I kept my mouth shut.

Sooooo....post-adoption-travel-meeting where they spent approximately 2.5 hours of the allotted 4 reminding us that:

• Don't drink the water. Water will make you sick.
• Me, wonderful SW who doesn't return calls? I've been to Chinas 40-some times.
• China is a different country.
• China will not look, smell or sound like the US.
• You can't speak freely in China.
• Don't ask embarrasing questions.
• Don't assume you can take pics of everything.
• 10 years ago, they were paranoid about you asking about politics etc...
• We'll try to help you find American food.
• I get to meet with bigwigs in China, cause I'm an important adoption guy.
• Me, adoption SW guy, I've been there a lot of times. I've tried dog.
• Really, I'm most important. We have to go to Beijing first, cause I'm someone that they have to meet with.
• Hey did we tell you that China isn't like the US.
• Oh yeah, don't drink the water.
• They respect us cause we're such a good agency.
• Me, adoption SW guy, I've been to China alot. I have a lot of stories meant to scare the crap out of the few of you that haven't been to China.
• Don't drink the water. Really, it'll get you sick.
• Bring craploads of money.
• If you don't take the tour, we won't make you pay for it (even though we made your friend who was in Fujian pay for group dinners in Hunan with the rest of the group a little over a year ago, cause they were "group rate"), so I don't believe that.

Then there was the important part...the part they did in less than 45 minutes, but still interjected the beating-you-over-the-head with the obvious...

• Oh, and also, there's a lot of potential medical issues, here's a confusing chart of what you should bring medicine-wise for both you and baby, and we've mixed them together for ease-of-confusion.
• Oh, crap, I've blathered on about the China-not-being the US (like you did at Part 1 of the travel meeting a year ago, for 4 hours), so now we're late, and we, SWs want to go home cause it's late, never mind we scheduled this thing to end really late on a Friday night as it is...
• We've agreed to let siblings come, and we've changed the policy, but we're going to spend 30 minutes telling everyone that we think this is a really really bad policy, and I'm head of the program, but apparently, someone else makes decisions for my program.
• Oh, yeah, there might be a bunch of issues with sensory stuff, grieving etc, but because I talked about myself so much I'm going to totally gloss over this stuff, point at the power point page on the wall in 30 seconds or less per page...
• Now, get out, I want to go home.
• Oh, and remember, you might have to not get Cheerios for a few weeks. But if you need them, pack them, and the whole group will have to shoulder the over-weight charges.
• Oh, and don't drink the damn water.
• Lastly, all the "specific to your group stuff"? Well, they can't tell us any of that, cause they don't know squat yet, cause they just sent our acceptances not even a week ago! Soooo...nothing specific to us, except that we are all stupid compared to the SW when it comes to anything pertaining to travel, China, or air travel.

I avoided head-of-program/non-returner of emails/master traveller of China dude and did not speak to him all night. I wasn't going to be able to hold my sarcasm, and it wasn't going to get my anywhere, so I just didn't go there.

Even when they were telling us to buy clothes based on updated medical reports (which, if they hadn't shipped our translations to a translator who wasn't out of the country, and they therefore sat there for a week unopened, we would maybe actually have the new reports)...you know, at 6 months, H was 50% for weight, and if she's 50% for weight in the updated, then find out what 50% is for 11 months, and buy based on that...which we can't do, because we still aren't even close to that, because they are too busy setting up schmmoooze meetings with someone in Beijing. Even then, I just buttoned my lip and didn't say what I wanted to say. I was a good girl.

I didn't say anything when he said "Don't worry ladies, we'll make sure there's plenty of time for you to shop." "Sometimes, the Moms get hurt when the baby may decide to bond to Dad first. It'll happen, it's hard for the Mom's though. They've had an image in their head." Bite me dude - do I look like a feeble minded June Cleaver to you? Did you ever think that P might be hurt if she rejects him, even with all that testosterone in his veins? Did you ever think that P is the one I have to cutoff buying stuff on trips? (I'm a collector of all things pretty too, don't get me wrong!) Nothing like a healthy dash of sexism thrown in thruout the meeting!

I just have to get thru, what 60-90 days or so, and then I'm done with these people?!

Remember, don't drink the water...