Sunday, January 11, 2009

Socks & Juice: The Banes of My Existance

I'm again tired and cranky...so, I'm bitchy again...

I've had it with socks. Y'all crazy tree-hugger people who insist on wearing socks with your Birkenstocks? I don't get it...you've committed to the crazy of wearing sandals thru the snow, so why do you put up with socks? I'm convinced that socks are a giant marketing ploy that garners tons of cash for the clothing industry: Kids socks? Like you don't lose those constantly? All socks: Really, seriously? Why do they cost so stinkin' much? It's a tube that's been sewn shut at one end. And the quality usually sucks.

I've bought socks at Ko*l's, target, E**ie Bauer, J Ji**, all those kinds of stores...dept stores, discount stores...egad, specialty stores. And they all suck. Do you know how many pairs I've thrown away in the past week? 4. Yes. For me alone. I refuse to touch P's socks. He can wear them till there's no elastic and more holes than sock, I've given up that fight. I had one pair I'd worn 3 times...yes, 3 times that busted a hole in the toe. And I had to (sob) throw out a pair I hate to admit I spent $15 on from Garnet H*ll cause they had some chasmere in them...and they were gray with turquoise polka dots (I love them dots)...I had them less than a year.

So, let's see, the mark up is like 700%? And the good ones last as little time as the cheap ones? Hummmmmm....I bet the good socks all go to Paris or something. I'm about to go reverse-Birkenstock....my $$$ men's dress shoe look shoes with NO socks.

How do you like that, sock-mafia?

Same for you, pillow industry....I'm on to you too...once I take down the Sock Gambinos...I'm coming for you.

And juice? Seriously? Sick kid...needs hydration (ok, maybe it's the pedialyte)...I don't think there's any tile left in my house that isn't covered in a sticky goo...why doesn't the pedialyte come with a complimentary mop?

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