Please....stop. Please, I give in. I'll do anything, just make it stop.
Ok? You want me to admit some stuff? OK.
Agree to do some stuff? OK. I'll do that too.
I'll put the soccer ball sticker on the back of a new minivan, which I will purchase in silver, if not available in beige.
I'll put away all my cool, beautiful, hand made - and even the extravagant-easy-to-buy-and-she'll-love-it jewlery. I'll break down and get one gold plated necklace that is a birthstone necklace of my kid. I'll wear it every day, with little gold ball earrings, and that's it. I'll even get too lazy to put on my wedding ring most days.
I'll give up all my beautiful shoes and buy one pair of ugly-ass but comfy shoes. Never mind that I pay good money for my beauties so that they feel good too. I understand now.
I'll give up chocolate.
I'll grow my hair long enough to end up in a pony tail at the base of my neck. I will do no more than wash and wear it.
I'll throw away all nail polish...it only goes on my toes anymore anyways.
I'll have long discussions about the awesomeness of swiffers...or swifters, whatever the hell they are called. I'll make that my first discussion.
I will come up with some annoying phrase that I say to my kid in public when she's misbehaving, one that only further annoys the people who have had to listen to her temper tantrum already.
I agree to all of the above. In exchange, please let my one-size-bigger-than-the-rest-of-me ass find one lone pair of jeans that fit them. Even if they are mommy-jeans...I'll submit to that. I will change over to the whole loss of my own identity, if I can have one damn pair of jeans that fit me without having 10 extra inches in the waist. Just make the trauma of trying these things on stop. Hello, wasn't Marilyn Monroe built like this (if only I could have the rack to go with it!)? And Jean Harlow? WTF? Apparently no one has hips in this world anymore except me.
Where do I find a good pair of mommy jeans?
5 comments:
It depends on your size. If you are 14 plus, then I hear Lane Bryant has incredible jeans sized to your body in the store.
I have also heard great things about the custom to you jeans on QVC.com
Don't panic. Once your girl is in school, you'll get fancy again. The mom look is usually only around during the tougher years! You'll look dumpy again when she's a teenager!
There is a brand of jeans called, Not My Daughters Jeans. Totally lame name, but they fit great and come in several different styles. They are not "mom jeans" at all, but they have more then a 1 inch zipper! A little pricey though, Nordstrom sells them for around $100.
Good luck, shopping for jeans stinks!
Thanks for the suggestions...
I'm theoretically a size 12 jean. I wear a 8-10 dress, depending on the style. But it's that genetically inherited ass of mine...H is very very lucky she doesn't have my genes just because of that ass.
Really, I can't imagine what image y'all have of me now!
Haven't had any problem with Calvin Klein stretch. Or try Anchor Blue stretch.
Wow, I think we have the same body, ISO! Fun about the big old ass, no?
I really like men's jeans. They seem to be roomier in the assal region and less so in the waist, so they fit great. And the bonus for me is that I like designer jeans, so I just buyg then men's versions on Ebay for less than at fancy dept stores. Best to try them on at fancy depot stores first, though, so you know how a particular brind will fit. For me, Men's True Religion in a 32 waist are perfect. I will be singing their praises forever. Yes, you will have to get them hemmed, but it is SO worth it for a pair of super cute jeans that fit.
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